DEAR MISS MANNERS: I recently visited an elderly friend for the first time since the pandemic. Before my visit, she asked me what I would like to eat.
I didn’t know how to answer that. Since I was going to go somewhere else after my visit, I told her not to worry about it; I would get something to eat later.
Just when I was about to leave her home (and getting hungry), in walks her daughter with donuts. Later, I learned that when some other friends came to visit, she served them pizza and salad! Maybe that’s what they requested -- I don’t know.
Anyway, I’m going to visit again soon and I’m not sure what to say if asked about food again. Maybe, “Anything but donuts”?
GENTLE READER: Awkwardly as your friend handled it, Miss Manners asks wide tolerance for hosts who have not figured out how to avoid being lectured by guests on the food they serve or do not serve.
The proper response -- and certainly the one that will warm any host’s heart -- is, “I am happy with whatever is easiest for you.” Even if that produces donuts.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
Latest Advice Columns
- Dear Abby: Woman who felt invisible in high school feels the same way at 50th class reunion
- Today’s daily horoscope for March 6, 2025
- Miss Manners: It’s not your job to critique a coworker’s clothing choices (bunny costumes included)
- Dear Annie: 31-year-old is ‘constant source of conflict’ in his father’s marriage
- Asking Eric: Siblings agree that mom should be in assisted living ... all but one sibling, that is